Comments on: the sleep wars

By: Sarah

Sarah — Tue, 29 Jan 2008 04:32:45 +0000

I’ve been out of the loop for awhile… sorry, been here, just not able to comment. I’m sure you’ve got your share of literature on sleep, but try The Sleep Lady System… it works great!

By: Jessie (gossipMOM)

Jessie (gossipMOM) — Sat, 26 Jan 2008 01:32:22 +0000

I am going through the exact same thing right now with my 2 year old. I know a lot of friends who have had success with “crying it out”, however, he’s just starting to be able to express being scared. As a result, it is unbearable to think that I may be putting him through a traumatic experience. While this may be over the top and some might think I’m over-reacting, I’m the one who is suffering from lack of sleep, not the naysayers. So I will do what makes me comfortable. I applaud you for doing the same!

By: Shannon (The Cole Mine)

Shannon (The Cole Mine) — Fri, 25 Jan 2008 21:21:27 +0000

Please don’t feel guilty for waiting to sleep train. If you are frazzled about it and try to do it, chances are it will backfire anyway. Waiting is best if that’s what’s in your heart right now. Parenting is SO tough. And I can relate to the husband thing – my husband works nights so I am on my own when it comes to sleep training and bedtime routines etc. It is really hard and I experience MANY of the same things you mention here – feeling out of control, over it, exhausted, etc. This is totally normal. Most of all know you are NOT a failure. As parents we just do our best (and sometimes darn it our best is to just take a break from it all) and feel good about it. You are doing a great job; have two wonderful girls and are a great Mom.

By: JoLynn

JoLynn — Fri, 25 Jan 2008 16:33:45 +0000

O.K. Tell me Iam weird, I have a 17 yr. old, 12 yr. old and my baby is 9 but I still watch Super Nanny!! We all need help once in a while!! And her way of tackling the sleep war’s is to give little Pea one chance of “bothering you” and after that it’s NO TALKING to her, eye contact, NOTHING!!! Just keep putting her back to bed or rather tucking her in, whatever. and by the 2nd or 3rd night you will have accomplished what you’ve been waiting for, “sweet dream’s”!!! She will realize that this is no longer a game and Mommy isn’t going to put up with it anymore!! I know it sound’s SO HARSH and MEAN but it really does work!!!! And EVERYONE will be happier in the end!! Good luck!!

By: mel

mel — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 20:51:11 +0000

I really lucked out with my only child, he started sleeping through the night at 6 months and now at 2 years old he goes to bed at 8:30 and doesn’t wake up till 8:30 am. I always made his room a very comfy, dark place for him to sleep. This backfired though because he won’t sleep anywhere but his own bed! No slumber parties at Nana’s house Good luck Melissa, I enjoy your blog.

By: Erin

Erin — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 15:13:32 +0000

That post resonated with me Melissa….
We didn’t “sleep train” our baby until she was almost two. Life happens…
I just tell myself when the chaos is erupting that in a matter of years the moments where I can rock my sweet little girl to sleep or give my son “pat pats” on his back as he drifts off will soon be gone. It helps when I am so tired etc. all I want to do is fall into bed and crash.
I hope things get better though!!!

By: Nona

Nona — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 13:29:07 +0000

Oh I just hear the tiredness in your post. And I totally relate to it. Can you tell Pea you aren’t going to answer her and she needs to sleep? As for Coco, I totally agree that waiting until you have more rest under your belt is a super idea. May tonight bring your household sleep and peace.

Also, could it be that GiGi visiting has kind of usurped everything?? Sometimes that can happen…

By: Tara

Tara — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 08:08:13 +0000

My girls usually wake up somewhere between 7 and 9:00 a.m. but before you make up your mind to hate me, let me just tell you that my twin THREE year olds don’t sleep through the night. And my 7 month old still sleeps in our bed between me and my husband and she wakes up about 4-5 times a night and she is refusing to nap. My 4 year old can’t seem to fall asleep unless someone is with her (nearly impossible) and nobody takes naps anymore. They are in bed at 8:00 every night and I think the reason they sleep so late is seriously because exhaustion sets in at some point during the night and they just pass out. Every morning I wake up with a minimum of 3 girls in my bed.

I feel just like you do. The baby is my last and I just want to hold on to her baby-ness for as long as possible too. But dang it, I need some sleep! I am a light sleeper and I wake up practically every time she moves. Thank you for admitting to laziness. I know that’s partly my excuse too… Laziness, combined with baby love and a healthy dose of fear (of sleep training) are what keep me so sleep deprived, that I’m just barely hanging on to my sanity everyday.

As for my older 3, they were all sleep trained at one time or another. I don’t know what happened. I’m calling it a phase. Yeah, that’s what it is right? I hope.

I wish I could offer some advice but I don’t have any. Hang in there and know you’re in good company.

By: Sonja

Sonja — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 06:50:38 +0000

Sleeping is such a precious commodity. I feel like you do, I recently heard that one of the best remedies for aging is sleeping. Ha! Clearly they weren’t talking to new Mommys. I calculated the other day, that I haven’t had a good night’s rest in approx. 2 years. LL still wakes up 2-3 times at night (even if she’s not teething) JF never a problem. Just go with the flow if you can, no need to set any expectations, it’s hard but I’m with ya in spirit. And thinkin about you during my 2 a.m. wake-up time.

By: Latte Mommy

Latte Mommy — Thu, 24 Jan 2008 06:30:33 +0000

There’s nothing worse than being sleep-deprived. You clearly are suffering, so don’t be too hard on yourself. If you’re not ready to leap into sleep training, then that’s ok. Just try to find a way so that you get enough rest so you can cope. Then, once you’ve found “coping you” again, you’ll be ready to take matters into your hands.

Till then, try to find a moment or two to have a nap. The laundry/dishes/floors/etc will all wait.